I headed out with Skip, Megzy and H.G. No Coach just two of the boys, the rest of the crew are recovering from Ironman Melbourne. Coach gave me my instructions and we headed North and up!
Once at the top of Bald Hill and into Helensburgh, Skip and I headed out for our repeats. Skip chasing four and me five. Talk about a mind fuck! The first interval was hard as I was watching the odometer the whole way so I knew where the turn around was. The second and third intervals were a total fight of will versus poor attitude (getting a lot of that lately). With Skip being a much stronger rider than me she was heading home on her fourth interval as I was heading out for my fourth. Alone now, but with other triathletes still on the road there was still company. It seems that every triathlete heading to Port Macquarie Ironman was out training on the same road as us today. I made it back to the starting point, end of number four.
I was in need of water so I pulled in at the fruit market, very conventently placed.... and also bought a coke and a banana. I stuck the banana in the back pocket. I wanted to save it for the turn around on the fifth interval...a kind of celebratorary meal I guess. I downed a little of the coke and then pushed off to start the last set. Funnily enough the last set was easier to get into than the rest of the sets. I guess the brain had given in and obliginingly stopped grumbling while the legs got to work. I headed out, the sun was up now and the roads were empty. Wow, I'm the last man standing. Am I that slow?
There is a loop playing mercilessly in my head these days "I don't want to do this........" An internal battle rages as my stubborn side counters with "Hell we don't fail Sammi and we certainly DON'T QUIT~!" To be totally honest I do want to do this......Ironman. but, I am still so undercooked. I guess I know that the day is not going to be what I hoped for so I mourn a lost opportunity, but also...its going to bloody hurt like hell. I guess no one goes merrily into the hurt locker. It's about the strength and tenacity to see it through that makes the difference. I am just not so sure I have that strength in me. hmmm self doubt. I think that is normal.
I finished the ride working hard all of the way home on little more than a mouthful of warm, sticky flat coke and 20mls of Dextro gel. It was hard going, but now sitting here of course I am satisified with my ride and effort...the pain far behind already. oh except for a sting every time I pee lol.