Lost it….

Because no one reads this but me, I feel safe putting this here.

Where did it go? Far out. 9 years just disappeared in an instant. One minute I was an Ironman triathlete, the next…an old menopausal lady. We’ll post menopausal now to be honest. Constant itb issues ground me down, a program on repeat and try to improve, but never did, left me exhausted and deflated, and new job, lost love, study, injury and suddenly not only am I old, but grossly over weight and miserable also..

I thought signing up for Ironman again would be the motivation I needed to lose the weight. But frustratingly the weight continues to pile on because I am a closet eater. I didn’t realise until recently that I am always snacking. But also, I can’t break away from the sugar. I know I can’t drink alcohol and rarely do. My portions continue to be too big. Husband/chef is always giving me big portions and I have no will power to say stop and not clean my plate. 

While I am getting the training done, the results are not showing on the scales and it seems it’s getting worse!

We went bike packing for two days. Photos of course.

Here it is in all its chubby glory. My rational mind says, “hey Sammi, you’re 56 now and it’s ok to have a few extra pounds” of course Instagram, running with others half my age and being my own worse critic means that I am miserably unhappy with how I look. Regardless of how fit I might be - having ridden 110kms last weekend! Getting older is hard. I forget though, that’s the kicker! So today I bought….a new bike! Far out! And an expensive one at that. Shouldn’t I be winding down now? But I have inspiration. I have Mary, Susan, Angela, Sandra…. All women older than me being fit and healthy and out there. But all  skinnier than me and fit and trim. I need more inspiration from older women. A path to follow. I don’t want to give up, so I pick up my shit and keep going right?!