Saturday, August 24, 2013

Backsliding with nowhere to go.........

And that's how I feel at the moment. I usually have a goal or two up my sleeve that keeps me motivated and heading in a direction, usually forward, but that depends on the day of course and injury status.

However, this year (post Ironman that is) I have no real goal. I chewed over attempting to get to world championships in the Olympic distance. Even identified which qualifying races I would need to do to get there. But it all seems a little distant and I am left wondering if it's really what I want to do. hmmmm. I know I don't do well without something to obsess about. A-type personality that I am. So currently I am obsessing about houses, jobs, travel, life, ooooh the new Suburu BRZ mmmmm very nice. Come to mumma I want you bad. But slap on the wrist. You know you don't want another loan Sammi. Sooo, boring as it sounds, the obsession needs to be PAY THE MORTGAGAE OFF.

Not a bad goal really. The implications would be that I could retire....nice. Not fair that Big Gazza has to keep working while I sit at home knitting. Part-time would be good though I have to say. I have found lately that I am feeling tired/old. I don't mean to say I am getting old, pht I'm only 47 for crying out loud. But it has been go go go for a few years now and maybe I just need some down time. Fear there of course is that once you snooze you lose. I also don't want to lose my AP Crew family. Its been a blast being a part of something so tangible and elastic. As a group we are growing and evolving constantly. We rejoice in the triumphs of others, celebrate the wins, hug the crew member who is injured or benched and rally round to encourage each other. The cold of winter has kept me insulated and a little lost.

But, I do feel a sense of waking up. After all, Spring is just a short week away. The winds have started and I know the temperatures will drop again. But soon this little grub wrapped in her winter cocoon will wake up and see the sun again. Come on can do it. Get here fast. Sammi needs some light, warmth and a refreshing slap up the side of the head to get going again.
Climbing out of the National Park to enjoy the sun and view

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