Sorry, I don't bake Cupcakes.........

It's been such a long, long week. I'm tired.



Lil Pumpkin dancing in the Canola fields

My week started with a visit to check out the new borders for my HRM role. I found myself behind the wheel of my lil sweet ride burning up the straight roads towards Cowra and Forbes. This little city mouse was on her way to the country. 5hrs of driving. Its a haul when you're on your own, but only made bearable by the purr of engine, the doof doof of the tunes running through the pipes and the brilliant colours of the countryside. Startling emerald green contrasted against the yellow gold of the blossoming Canola fields. Now throw in a lil Pumpkin and we have a mighty pretty picture and a couple of minutes distraction to break up the drive.

To be honest, I'm not looking forward to this drive becoming a regular part of my life. It was an unexpected change in life and career, one I didn't apply for, but was given. I am desperately trying to work ways to drag out the time between visits. Over servicing on Skype, one option. Never knock a gift horse they say and yes, I will go where the wind takes me.......But still a visit every 6-8 weeks means I need to build in some strategies for training. So far I have located a 5+km run course and a 50m outdoor pool (not sure if its heated yet though). And of course the bike and add the spin trainer. All good to go. I also found the pub for a meal and everything within walking distance of work and very modest accommodation. Looks like I am set. Big Gazza doesn't seem to be perturbed about the time I am away from home. Hmmm, not sure if I should be concerned. Perhaps he likes a little 'him' time.

On other fronts, I have been researching and refining my diet even further. A lot of time thinking about Wheat of late. I considered for a while the hype around Gluten free diets. You have to wade through the marketing, propaganda and fads and copious amounts of Pinterest....'How to lose 9lbs in one hour' type crap. You have to steer clear of celebrity diets and the big ones, Paleo, Aitkins, Military etc and get back to the science. It's a mine field. Always keen for an experiment using myself and sometimes Big Gazza as the human Petri Dish, I set about eliminating wheat from my diet for 2 weeks to see what, if any, changes occurred. And well, 800gms down on the scales, a flatter stomach, clearer skin (even after the major changes from eliminating sugar) and most importantly I noticed every night has been blissfully.....unbroken sleep. Nothing has changed as far as less stress, less training, less coffee and other standard reasons why you might find yourself waking up at night. So, I am interested to see how another 2 weeks goes with no wheat products in the diet and sticking with as much whole foods with as little processing as possible. Once 4 weeks are up, I will try some wheat products to see what effect it has on me, if any, and then draw my conclusions from there. I hope for radical improvements as I experienced when I dropped the sugar from my diet. But, we will wait and see.
 

Making Choices, Building Walls and Running Bricks.........

Its been a massive week. I caught up with Coach on Monday arvo just before swimming (swim test night arghhhh) and after we goofed about joking for a while, we got down to cheese and crackers. So, are we going to shoot for Western Sydney 70.3 or not? I put forward my argument for why nots. Work, house extensions, ITB issues and lack of run fitness and menopause. He knew it was decision time and whether to get my half entry fee back or not. I offered 100% commitment he agreed to 80% and we got on with business, quoting The Big Lebowski.

 

Meanwhile, I dialled my brain in to all systems go and put the pedal to the metal.

 

16 hours of training later I am sitting here writing this blog while feeling shattered but content. 4 x swims, 4 x runs, 3 x rides and 3 x strength sets later. Its gotta pay off. My ITBs are a little sore and flared up. I need to make sure I don't go backwards and this means making smart choices.

 

Since every choice matters......

Do you listen to your body or push through pain?

Well, I used to push through the pain and I still will come race day. But I have learnt and learnt the tough way, that pushing through the pain does not work. I have learnt to listen to my body and respond appropriately.

Do you fuel/hydrate before/during/after workouts or are you just getting by?

I have made major changes to my diet to ensure I am fuelling my body as an athlete. I have been sugar free now for 9 months and am working on dropping wheat as well. I hydrate well, but not well enough sometimes and end up with a headache if I don't drink enough water post session. I am conscious of pre training, during and after and I would say 9/10 times I get it right. But there is always room for improvement.

Do you give yourself time to warm-up before you start your workout or do you hope that you will loosen out when you get going?

Hmm, hell no. And I am aware I need to get better at this aspect. Most runs now have a 10min or so spin to warm up the legs. Swims I just jump in and go and see how I feel. Rides are a quick set of 1/4 squats and leg swings. This is definitely an area I can improve in.

Do you recognize that you gain fitness through consistency or do you just focus on getting-by?

Consistency - that word has been drummed in to me from the very moment I met Coach. I know consistency is key to strong gains and race day performance. Consistency in training builds the onion layers and without it I get injured.

Do you focus more on your body composition that you neglect proper fuel and nourishment or do you focus on performance and keeping your body in good health?

I'd like to say that I focus on keeping my body in good health. But I have to admit that there is still a part of me that dreams and wishes for the ultimate athlete's body and rocking abs. So, I sometimes cut the calories and keep the size portions low. Its a fine line between energy and chubby thighs peeps. I want to be an athlete, but I'm still a girl who is subject to the marketing propaganda. But my head knows better!

Do you make time for recovery or do you tell yourself that you will recover better tomorrow?

This has been a hard lesson to learn. But recovery is priority. I stick to the program as much as possible, barring work etc. What I can do is communicate with Coach more so I keep on top of the fatigue and manage it better.

Do you prioritize restful sleep or do you feel like you can just get by with little sleep so long as you don't miss a workout?

SLEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPP, is my number one issue. Its crazy to think that you can train for 4 hours at a time and then that night not fall into a restful sleep. Nope, not me, I am awake a 2am and restless and pacing the house. I have a theory that coffee after 1pm makes me wake up. Its worth tracking to see. But on the whole I try not to drink coffee after morning tea time. But sleep.....that mystical illusion that escapes me.

Are you flexible with your workout or do you struggle to modify when needed?

No struggle here. I have a Coach who writes me a day by day, session by session (if needed) program in response to what ever is happening with the body and life in general. It sometimes is a struggle to meet the hours of training around work and life, but I have learned that if a session is dropped, then you have to let it go. 

Do you get stuck in the moment rather than thinking about the big picture? 

I can't think about tomorrow let alone the big picture. My preference is to live in the moment. But I get it. See the big picture, remember the 'A' race and stick to the knitting. Hard to do at times. But a practice worth practicing.

Grateful moments: -

 

I am so grateful for these guys....





Front left, Tail end, front right, Slippery, back left, The Onion Man, back right, Big Gazza



My brothers (ok, so one of them is my husband. But when we train we are connected by a common goal, not by a ring AND Gazza isn't allowed to kiss me, or treat me any differently when I am in 'boy' mode). Tail end, The Onion Man, Slippery and Gazza and add to that The Plasma (Plasma doesn't do triathlon so rarely features, but he has been my saviour out on the ride so many times). We hit out for a round the lake ride followed by Jamberoo for the boys. I rode home under the protection of The Plasma. An hour later the boys rolled in, tired but still joking. A slow transition to run and I jumped on the MTB to show them my run course and off we went. They worked hard and followed me along the track. Later we stood in the road outside our house with 5kms in the bag. Happy and laughing I watched them gathered around and smiled, contented and grateful. My brothers and best mates. Guys I just couldn't do without.

 

 

Gazza and I have made a decision to stay in the house that we have been in for 20years. We are now planning another 20 years and I am grateful for having a house that has raised a child, harboured a family and kept us safe, has known laughter and love and just enough tears and sadness to appreciate and be grateful for the good times. I love my little house and I am grateful for the people that come and share this space and I hope that they feel they are welcome and loved. 

This weekend was spent adding more stacked stone to the front entry way. I am so pleased with the way it is looking. Of course we had to find our roles. It ended up with Gazza cutting and cleaning and Sammi on the trowel.

 

And finally, my last grateful moment is to this guy. My Coach and friend, AP.

 







                                               

                                        Coach qualifying for World Champs 70.3 in 2016. Boom!





 

 

I remember the first time I met him. It was raining and I dragged my bike out of my car and dripping stood in the physio rooms waiting to have a bike fit. He took one look at me and got to work. We forgot about the bike for the time being and he focused on me, my flexibility, strength, weakness and body alignment. That was 5 years ago. Wow, we have had some good times, some honest and frank discussions, many, many laughs and just a few races in between. He has my respect and when you scroll through my blog you will see a healthy dose of Coach love. But, hey, you gotta have respect and be prepared to march to one drum. And I know when all this craziness is over and the carousel rolls to a stop, we will still be mates for life!  

Wake up! Rise and Shine Sammi......

So, this week is decision time. Whether to go on to do Western Sydney 70.3 or pull the pin on the idea and refocus on something else.

Over the shoulder, looking back I can see. A winter of hit and miss training. Not the best prep for the race. No running since mid June has me way way back on my run training, AGAIN. Back now though to 10 x 3min run, 30 sec walk. So I'll be back to 10kms fairly quickly. The smart lab rat has to ask whether that is enough and pushing on to get the 21 might just be asking too much right now. Swim, I'm good to go and would hit up the 2kms at the race comfortably I'd reckon. Bike? Well not so much but I could be there. Averaging about 70kms each long ride at the moment with some speed, I think I could give the 90kms come race day a go, but it wouldn't be my fastest race to date.

Other factors, work just ramped up to an all time high. I just got given another promotion, and what that means is more travel. I'm going to need to be creative around my program and work even harder to get the training in. With additional 'visibility' being requested out at Western between now and Christmas it means a challenging road ahead to November 29.

An additional factor that I hadn't anticipated was the Sammi clock ticking on at a rapid rate. The dreaded night sweats have started and all things '50 old lady' have arrived. Always the insomniac, but now it's a regular night of tossing and turning, covers on, covers off affair and many slow starts to the day. I need to address this pretty quickly and get on with my life.

And exciting, but another possible impact may be the house extension. We had a draftsman come round this weekend and together we worked on some ideas. He will be back next weekend with some drawings for us to pour over. Life may get busy for a while. I'm excited by the prospect of creating something for Gazza and I to share for the next 20 years of our life together.

It's a lot to pack in. But most importantly is the running. To push on right now may have some interesting outcomes. But an outcome I am all too familiar with. Push and give 100% to the training and not make it to race day because I am undercooked or the legs let me down. Then the frustration, anger, hopelessness, that comes with standing on the sidelines holding the bags while the boys all run pass me. Baby hates being benched.

So, I could pull the pin now, get half my race entry back, and aim for a few Olympic races through the season, or not race at all this year. Husky long course? The accommodation is booked, I just need an athlete to turn up on the day.

I have treatment with Coach this afternoon, so I will get back to you shortly.

Grateful moment:

Once again I am grateful for my family. My brother is in Saudi Arabia and he and his wife are due to have their first baby in November. It's a special time for all of us and he is so far away from home. Kristin sent out the word that he was badly homesick and could we do something special for Fathers Day for him. The gifts from around the world came flooding in and Wishy was so surprised. I am sure there would have been tears. I would not want to live in any other family. I love the one I am in and am grateful for every single cherished person in it.

I adore this man, my brother. He is the voice of sense and reason, he is the humour that I wish I had. He is the seer of all things beautiful and he appreciates every single moment he has on this earth. He loves genuinely and deeply. He is never ashamed of his actions or intentions. He wears his love like a badge, swings it like a sword and shields us all under it with the strength and conviction of a knight.

I am grateful for sunshine, both real and man made. As I've said, its an effort to get to sleep, but when I do get to sleep I get in deeper than an Alabama tick. And waking up is so hard. I love my bed and I love my sleep and I know the health benefits that sleep brings. It's a time for healing, rejuvenation and growth (also a time for Sammi to fix the world's problems, but that's another post). But, when asleep, it then is very hard for me to wake up. So, I am grateful for my new purchase. A sunrise lamp.

30mins before my alarm time, this little beauty gets to work and starts waking me up. A soft glow at 30mins out, and in 10minute increments, gets brighter and brighter. Yep, it works a treat. I wake up gently and almost naturally. I could just sleep with the curtains open, I hear you all say. lol. But this is the closest I can find to resetting my internal clock and waking up refreshed. BUT, just in case I sleep through, this little guy gives off a little gentle beep alarm, not like Gazza's shrill beast of all thinks rude awakenings. 

 

I am also very grateful for coffee. I love being in the rare 29% of the population of coffee drinkers. It certainly helps on race day too.

 

Tuesday Musings.........

Ah, yes....the best laid plans of mice and Sammi's hey. Day 1 of the extreme 'whip Sammi into race form' went well. Ticked the box by starting on a huge strength set, followed by a cardio set. Next up, Swim with the AP squad. I was surprised after a week of almost dying from the flu that I had energy and the 1:10hr or so went by very quickly. 2900m under the belt. Got home, and set up the little red bike on the spin trainer.

All ready to smash out day 2. Got up dragged on the gear, jumped on the bike and started the warm up. hmmmm and then the wheels fell off the bike (well almost). A hard clicking, jumping noise was coming from the rear derailleur. WTF! Oh yeah, now I remember. On Saturday arvo I returned my bike to the spin trainer and instead of setting it up, I balanced it on the trainer and as I turned, baby fell against the trainer and it all tipped and landed with a sickening crunch on the floor. I sat it up and thought "I'll deal with you later" well later was now and my heart sank. I had just got Little Red back from the bike shop in Nowra and had turned inside out and pulled favours with Dood to get the bike picked up and it was running like a dream. Now....not so much. I went back to bed with a coffee, defeated.

Home this afternoon, I applied my basic bike mechanic knowledge to the situation and well, lets just say I wont be giving up my day job for a career with Quickstep any time soon. Bugger! I rang Spearmans and have booked it in for another service. this is getting expensive!

So what am I grateful for today......

I'm grateful that I didn't let the crash and burn get to me too much and I headed to the gym for a strength session, basically to work off some stress from work today, but to also try and stay on track with training.

Grateful that I have people I can rely on in my life. Dood, to the rescue as always.



Sailing with Dood, some of my most favourite and treasured memories

I'm grateful for Spring. I have survived another winter. That's 49 so far. I'm on a roll. You think it would be getting easier by now and kind of predictable. But mmm, not so much. I love Spring. It will soon be time to wake up from my sleep, my hibernation, my cold winters dream. I can't wait.

Count Down Begins..............

Well a month down the track. What's news!

Running. A huge 1:30 run/1:00 walk. Can only go up from here team. The ITBs are good. None, to minimal burning at the knee joint. Time to get cracking. Yep, its 3 months yesterday til Western Sydney 70.3. Bring it on!

By that I mean, its time to put me at the forefront of all things Sammi again. This means (only) a small mind shift..lol. to put everything back in focus to get the job done come November 29. Work will become a strictly 9-5 affair. Gaz will take on the majority of household chores and I will be fuelling the athlete again. Bout time.

Now this could all fall horribly apart if the ITBs fail. I have a decision day of Sept 10 on the calendar (that's when I can still get 1/2 my race entry back) BUT we can't/won't focus on that otherwise we will have a self fulfilling prophecy on our hands. Nope, I was running 10km up until recently, we can get back there again pretty quickly and then hold till race day.

So over the next 3 months the posts should pick up as I download the latest happenings. Strap yourselves in team, grab the popcorn, pull your chair a little closer to the computer screen and hang on for the ride.

But before we hit up the Sammi Big Screen Extravaganza, we better take a quick look over the shoulder....

What a huge weekend.
The girls came home and Kez told us of the latest plans, she is off on deployment AGAIN on a 'Secret Squirrel' mission. Can't even tell her Marja for crying out loud! I asked her if she is going 'hot' she said no.  Well that's a relief. She is staying in Aus, but high security. I have serious doubts that Aus is capable of anything warmer than a bowl of Mumma Bear's porridge. Let's just say.... I don't see an Area 51 type scenario here folks. So there she goes for 3 months M.I.A. GREAT!

We enjoyed a great weekend though. We hit out early Saturday morning for a ride along the lake foreshore. Breakfast in The Village and then a leisurely ride. Much better than the 90min spin sesh I was supposed to do. We still ended with 90mins (avg 15kph) but much more enjoyable.

And later in the day, a walk to burn off the Ribs and Beer. Sparky had a hankering for Ribs and did us proud when she downed a full side of beef ribs. It was nice and relaxed as we strolled along Warilla Beach. So many wonderful memories of Kezwaldo and G'Dood playing in the breakers. I love that place.

A fun night chilling in front of the telly with the girls laying on the floor snuggled under a doona. And all is right with in the Sammi world. Up at 6am and hurtling South first thing on Sunday morning was a little bit of a shock. Someone got his wake up times wrong. We made it to Husky with a handful of minutes to spare. The gang looked keen to go pre race.

With new additions to the AP10 family Sam and Charlie (nicknames will need to come soon to save the innocent) ol' Slippery ready as ever. Big Gazza taking back stage as always and Megzy looking a million bucks; we sent them off down the road.

It was great to have some time with AP and Ava while everyone was out sweating. We made our way to the 5 Little Pigs and downed a coffee and chatted about nothing. Good times. Ava sat happily chortling in her own secret conversation and making sweet work of a vegemite sanga chased down with a banana. It was relaxed and I didn't miss racing one little bit!

We made our way to the finish line and were joined by the girls and Scoutie. I have to say, even with the additional support of a Megaphone, I am a little hoarse tonight. We saw everyone home in P.Bs and first time run excellence.

3 x Gratitude moment:

I am grateful to have so many wonderful people in my life who fill me with warmth and laughter. Their friendship, love and kindness lifts me to places that I never dreamed possible. So cherished.

I am grateful for time. Precious time. Of quiet comfortable silences. Of time spent laughing til tears roll. Of time spent with family and friends. To time past, present and future. So much to look back on when life decides it is reflection time.

I am grateful for a sharp razor. I have been using the same razor now for about 6 months or more. I have been thinking about the purchase, but haven't gotten round to it. So, today some serious deforestation occurred in the personal hygiene department. Lets just say, I didn't look like Norman Gunstan with bits of toilet paper stuck all over my legs for a change and I can finally face Spring...Bring it on!

The injured athlete - take it from me..........

Year after year, season after season, I have been defined, destroyed and strengthened by 2 x cranky Iliotibial Bands (itb).  

I remember the very first time it reared its ugly head. It was 2010. I had signed up for Ironman Port Macquarie and the body couldn't handle the load. My Coach had perhaps not truly understood my poor level of fitness and no base. Or more accurately, perhaps it was me that absolutely had no idea what I had signed up for and didn't understand enough about base and the onion layers required to get the Ironman job done properly. I ran my marathon. But prior to race day, I hit wall after wall of ITB issues.

I was devastated. I felt embarrassed, anxious, stressed and uncomfortable and simply put, my life just sucked. I would turn up to run group and walk round the oval following the runners. Some weeks I could manage a short run. We ended up doing all bike work and elliptical and then I just turned up and ran on race day. Not your best planned lead up to an Ironman.

Every morning I would wake up wondering if I could run pain free. I went to bed hoping that tomorrow I would be in less pain. I wished for the day that I could run without pain. Yep that was many years ago.

 

I was no fun to be around and my husband was still riding and running and I was envious of his freedom to use is body however he wanted. I was jealous that my 'larger' friends could run. I still hate watching the lady running every morning pushing a double sized running pram with two kids jammed into it. How does she do it day after day? I didn't want to be around anyone who was an athlete and I cried a lot.

I did everything I could to fix the problem. I stopped almost all training to "rest" my knees, saw massage therapists, constantly stretched and rolled, got a few cortisone injections, googled, searched Slowtwitch for answers. I was desperate and I didn't know any better but to try to quickly fix myself as soon as possible. 

 

After so many years of dealing with itb issues, often times not running for up to 3 months year after year, I've learned a lot about myself. When you are a chronically injured athlete (despite doing everything that you are told to do to keep yourself healthy and to overcome the injury), you hit some very low moments. Looking back, I have had many scenarios where I have had to make tough decisions. As an athlete, some of my hardest decisions to make were not which races to register for in a season but instead, how to approach the season when an injury arises. I have not made it to t he start line for so many races, not completed, or not entered races.

Every athlete handles an injury differently and sadly, injuries are bound to happen. The human body is not as resilient as we think/want it to be. I get it! Regardless of the physical pain, it's really the mental and emotional pain that is the most difficult part of being injured. Not only do you experience a loss of your sport but there is a dramatic change in your lifestyle. Workouts are removed, there is more time spent at doctor appointments and physical therapy treatments and there can be many days when it feels like the day is just a waste without a workout, just like old times. 

When you are the athlete who is injured, it is hard to think long term. It's hard to make good decisions that will benefit the future rather than what feels "right" at the moment.  Every effort is focused on quick healing and patience is an extremely hard trait if a race is on the horizon. For coaches, loved ones and friend's of an injured athlete, it is really difficult to say the right thing. As an athlete, you see that time is running out before a key race but the injury is just taking longer than anticipated to heal and that can be extremely frustrating.

Not racing or not completing the entire race is certainly one of the toughest decisions I have had to make. And I have had to make the decision time and again. It Sux! Dealing with it comes with a roller coaster of emotions. Acceptance, denial, frustration. Certainly a hard working athlete should be hard working in the rehab process? Right? But it's not easy to be all smiles and rainbows when you can no longer do what you love to do. 

So what's the advice I give myself having a 70.3 race in November? 

Don't let this injury define me. No one is taking away my athlete status. I do not have to prove that I am tough as nails by pushing through pain. Do what I need to do to get myself healthy again. That is all that matters. Every day that I let my ego get the best of me, is a day that I could have made progress with healing. Be patient. I may not feel it now, but I will heal. And if I am proactive during my recovery/rehab, I will not only heal but I will be stronger than before.

Don't let this injury destroy me. There's no need to throw in the towel. I can think about many of my friends, age group, elite and professional athletes who have had incredible comeback stories after overcoming an injury. There are athletes who have been injured and then beaten the odds and other athletes who struggled for a long time and provided an extreme dose of motivation with their initial comeback to the sport. I have to be doubly motivated to put in the work to heal myself. Come back too soon and I will experience more time lost. Keep myself as fit as possible by focusing on what I can do, pain free, so that I do not cause any more setbacks. When I am ready to make my return back to full training again, I will be so happy that I did not give up when the going got tough. I will not be injured forever - don't forget this.

Do let the injury strengthen you. I will be mentally stronger. I will be my own comeback story. How will my story end? What do I see as my happy ending? What's motivating me to get better? What's keeping me focused and determined to not give up? I need to make smart decisions so I don't back track. And what will this injury teach me about myself? Its pointless being weak, lazy, unmotivated, angry or bitter! Rather, stay determined, focused, hard working and diligent that there WILL be a positive outcome when I DO return to the sport that I love.

 

Just do the right thing, make the right decisions and be smart.

It won't be easy, but it will be worth it.

 

So I sent Coach some thoughts in an email last night, with the above in mind. (I need to acknoledge TriMarni for the blog above, which I have edited to suit me. But her blog resonated with me so much)

 

Hi AP,

ok, so its 18 weeks til Western Sydney. What I have put down here is based on:
 

• keeping the load off the legs - I figure if I can keep away from running and the pounding then it will give the knees a chance to calm down and hopefully the inflammation will settle. So lots of elliptical and walking.
• Still keeping fit  - more bike and strength work in the hills, keep the load off, stay fit enough to run when its time to start again. Bike has no pounding on the legs.
• Staying strong in the legs and core - lots more strength work so that the muscles in my hips, legs, core get ready for running. I know 5 days core might seem a lot, but it would be different each day, like TRX, clams and planks etc 
• Moving forward - looking at every opportunity to keep working towards my goals and staying happy.

Obviously all is up for discussion when you get back. But my thoughts are this....

 

	Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday	Saturday	Sunday
AM	Strength & Core &                           Elliptical (1hr avail)	Outdoor ride (2-3hrs avail)	Swim (oak flats)	Indoor spin &                        walk/run off	Swim (oak flats)	Long ride	Recovery ride                               &/or 2+hr walk/hike
PM	AP10 Swim Squad &                                  Core work	Strength & Core &                           Elliptical (1+hrs avail)	Indoor spin &                   core work	Strength & Core &                           Elliptical (1+hrs avail)	Walk (1-2hrs avail) &                           stretch & release	Open water swim or                                           long swim (oak flats)	stretch & release              family time

                                                                                                         

It Takes a Little While to Come Out............

I read this article the other day.....yeah Facebook. But it resonated with me so much I sent it to Big Gazza and when he was done reading he just looked at me and laughed. "That explains so much, its exactly you" he said. So I, in typical style pondered on this for a week or so and then decided to write a post. So here it is.

Note: I have edited, cut & paste, manipulated the article to suit my own purposes and I have no reference sorry.

Apparently it has been proven that 'highly' (I'm not suggesting that I am in the highly category) creative people’s brains work quite differently than other brains. That special brain wiring that can create such wonderful art, music, and writing can often lead to strain in a relationship, because of those differences. This translates as a good old fashion barny between Gazza and I when we are working on a building project together. We have discovered, over time, that if I draw it, he can build it.

If you’ve ever loved a highly creative person, you know that it can seem like they live in their own little word at times, and that thought isn’t far from the truth. Here are some things to keep in mind when you are in love with a highly creative person:

1. Their Minds Don’t Slow Down The highly creative mind is one that is running at full speed all the time. Although it can be a source of crazy, spontaneous fun – it can also be a burden. Highly creative people rarely keep normal sleep cycles, and are often prone to bouncing from one task to another throughout the day. It can be exhausting to try to keep up. Sleeeeeep, I can think of so many times when I have gone to bed with a problem and in the morning woken up with the solution. I had dreamt about it and my subconscious mind has solved it and then retained the information for me to share with Gazza in the morning. He has even woken up in the morning and said to me, "So, what's the answer?" and I have been able to tell him. He just shakes his head. I remember a time very clearly when Kez was just a baby. Her nursery was a large room with a picture rail and dado board running around the walls. I couldn't afford to buy a cupboard for her clothes. But overnight I dreamt a solution of placing two triangle shaped boards into the corner of the room and they would attach to the running boards and a curtain in front. Sorted! Bouncing from one task to another sounds sporadic and out of control. I'm the type of person who has a hundred balls in the air at once. I have projects happening, art work in progress and always something on the go. I have tried to uncomplicate my life. And sometimes there is too much going on. But un-complicating is hard for me and I inevitably clutter it up again. I live in a whirlwind. Its about cramming as much into my life as I can.

2. They are Cyclical The flow of creativity is a cycle, full of highs and lows. Some people may consider this “manic” behavior, but in reality, it is just how the creative process works. Keep this in mind as your partner goes through these natural ebbs and flows. The low periods aren’t permanent. There have certainly been a lot of ups and downs. Life is a rollercoaster. I say to Gazza often "Watch me for the changes and try to keep up." He does a pretty good job of both. There have been plenty of times when I have needed to recalibrate, have thrown artworks against a wall, fallen face first in the mud, panicked, spent days unmoving on the lounge, danced like a crazy person, held my hands in the air and whooped as life has sent me soaring towards the next exciting idea or experience and I try as hard as I can to take those who want to, along for the ride.

3. They Need Time Alone Creative minds need air to breathe. Whether it is their own little work space or an escape to somewhere quiet, they need a time and place to be alone with their thoughts. Some people are inclined to think that if nothing is being said that there is something wrong, but with creative people that is not the case. They are just working within their own head. Oh boy is this me! While I crave interaction and I am energised by people and love the idea of being social and having fun times with people. I fiercely hold on to my own time. I can disappear, if needed or by choice, into my own thoughts and scroll mentally through a list of thoughts, issues, challenges, new ideas, memories, stones left unturned and boxes that need unpacking. I can dream, scheme and scream in my own mind and I can do this when I am alone, or alone in a crowd of thousands. Its easy to disappear and ruminate. And I can get into trouble for it too. Whoops.

4. They are Intensely Focused
When a creative person is on task, they are fiercely intense. The change from being scatter-brained to hyper-focused can be difficult to deal with, so just understand that it is how their brains work. Don’t get frustrated. Hmmm, I don't feel like I am scatter-brained or chasing butterflies or shiny objects that catch my attention. But I can skip from activity to activity or idea to idea. Sometimes I can get in my own way and struggle with getting started. But, when the light turns green, then I am locked on. It is intense to the point of obsession and the fixation can sometimes get me into trouble. An example of this is the little 86 parked in the garage. The little orange car is the product of a solid year of fixation, obsession and intensity. I tried to fight it, but one day I just drove to the car yard and bought the car. With time and perhaps age and a little maturity, I have managed to recognise when I am fixating on something and can temper it (sometimes). So my latest obsession is about extending the house. Yes, my obsessions can get very expensive.

5. Emotions Run Deeper Creative people feel everything on a deeper level. What doesn’t seem like a big deal to you, can be crushing to them. It’s that same passion that goes into whatever they create that drives them to love you, so understand that with the good – comes the bad. I think over time and with maturity I have been able to keep my emotions on a fairly steady keel. But I can look back over my shoulder and remember times when I have been engulfed by emotion. Most prominent a jaw operation that went terribly wrong. Feeling trampled and helpless as the news rolled over me that the op had left me worse off than prior. The helplessness and blackness carried around from about 12years of age about my appearance. But also of note, the release of black energy when I came to terms about what I couldn't change or control. Freedom.

6. They Speak in Stories Creative people often express themselves in experiences, instead of just saying what they want to say. It is a way of sharing themselves that personifies who they are. At times, it can be difficult to figure out what a creative person is saying, so don’t be afraid to read between the lines. Guilty! Yes I talk in stories, I can go out and around the block and then bring it all back again to make my point. In conflict I often 'acknowledge' others feelings and start my own sentences with 'I feel.' Sometimes, ok often, others can hear this and wonder what the hell I am talking about. Meli was someone who struggled often with this. I found it hard to just say what I wanted to say straight up. I work hard on being a straight shooter, but often it can leave Gaz pulling what little hair he has left OUT!

7. They Battle with Themselves Being creative can be a serious internal struggle. Motivation, enthusiasm, direction, and drive can all be issues for creative people. Some days it is hard for them just to get out of bed, and other days you can’t get them to slow down. Be patient in the lulls, because there is usually a burst of activity right around the corner. As I said... life is a roller coaster. But there have been days when I have not moved off the couch. I call it 'The Little Black Cloud.' Its hard for me to see it closing in and it can hang around for quite a while. Its a work in progress that one.

8. Intuition is Important Creative people, because of their intense emotional tendencies, tend to rely on intuition over logic. They go with their gut. Some people consider this to be more on the “impulsive” end of the spectrum. The creative mind doesn’t rely on logic to make a decision, it relies on experience and passion. Case in point is the little car, a year long obsession and then an impulsive weekend drive to the caryard. But, I would never change the way I am driven by passion. Give me a moment of passion, than a lifetime of nothing at all. Give me life real, raw and unedited. Sometimes it hurts like hell, sure. But I want to experience every moment with intensity and love.

9. They Struggle with Confidence
When people create, especially for a living, they are always struggling with acceptance. That is art. They have to wear their hearts on their sleeves, and so they always question whether or not what they are producing is good enough. Being supportive is the key to loving a creative person. I could never sell my own work. I have given away so many artworks. The only way I could work was to work for someone who would then put a price (plus his cut) on my work. I hid behind the safety of Bron's negotiating and sale ability. I never wanted to work to a brief and climb into someone's head and try and see what they want me to paint. I'd much rather paint something and then if you like it, then you can offer me a price. Or you can take it if you like it. Easy.

10. Growing Up is Hard to Do Creative people are almost always children at heart. That care-free nature can seem immature and impetuous – but it is all part of the deal. Understand that the aspects of their creative brains that you love are the same ones that make them somewhat irresponsible when it comes to being an adult. oh I just don't like this growing up business. But who does? I enjoy wistful. I enjoy dreaming of flying and endless possibilities. I love horses and dreams. I don't want to make decisions, pay bills, plan for retirement, learn about super. ahhhhhhhhh I never want to grow up!